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This Saturday (17 May) is International Day Against Homophobia, Biphobia, and Transphobia (IDAHOBIT). To mark the occasion, Ry Kidd has written the following reflection.

Content warning: this story discusses topics related to discrimination, bullying, homophobia and transphobia, which may be distressing to some readers. If you or someone you know is affected by these issues, consider seeking support from a trusted person or professional resources.

I grew up in a small country town in Gippsland during the 80s and 90s. It was not a place to be different, and from an early age it was obvious I was not like other boys. I was quieter, more emotional, softer. I was in primary school the first time I was called gay, and even though I didn’t know what it meant, I knew it was an insult. 

In high school the bullying intensified to multiple times a day, I had “fag” written on my locker, called a “faggot” and told I’d die of AIDS amongst other forms of verbal abuse. Every day I was told that I was wrong, evil, that I didn’t deserve to live. I never felt safe. While I was told not to let it affect me, “water off a duck’s back”, it seeps into you, and I began to believe there was something wrong with me. That who I was, wasn’t OK. 

I was fortunate to have allies during this time. I had a loving family, some friends who supported me and a group of teachers that would rally around me to make sure I was OK. If it was not for their support, I doubt I would have made it through. 

I live with the mental scars of the bullying every day, however thanks to love, support and a great therapist, I’m able to appreciate who I am today. I love the fact that I’m gentle, empathetic and compassionate. The parts of me I was once bullied for are now my favourite attributes. 

“Inclusion is simply appreciating each other for who they are and treating each other with dignity and respect.”

For me, inclusion is not a buzz word or a workplace policy. It’s about appreciating and respecting our common humanity. Underneath the labels, we’re all just humans, trying to make our way in the world. Inclusion is simply appreciating each other for who they are and treating each other with dignity and respect. 

If the world was perfect, we wouldn’t have to fight to be accepted for who we are; fight to be given equal rights. We wouldn’t have to constantly put ourselves out there, to explain who we are and why we deserve to be treated as human beings, to ask, or even beg to be given respect. 

Unfortunately, we do not live in a perfect world. It is still illegal to be homosexual in 64 countries, punishable by death in some. Trans people are being used as political pawns (for the second election in a row in Australia), being outlawed from playing sports, having what bathroom they use scrutinised and criticised. Medical professionals treating youth with dysmorphia are being targeted, their morals and ethics questioned. The very rights the community fought so hard for in the decades I’ve been alive are under threat. 

Whether you are part of the LGBTIQA+ community, an ally, or even ambivalent to the cause, it is important to call out discrimination, homophobia, transphobia and ensure the people in your life know you love and support them today and every day. Everyone deserves to feel safe and respected. 

Ry is Melba’s Authorised Program and Reporting Officer